These days Pixar movies often sum up everything that’s missing from Disney’s mainstream releases – plot, characters you can root for, a distinct lack of songs about dreaming/the pain of being Miley Cyrus.
If only the two studios had linked up earlier…
It’s Christmas! And, try as we might, we couldn’t quite shoehorn in an article about Cliff Richard movies, so instead, here’s a classic Yuletide tale narrated by one of STS’s very favourite people – the always dour, but never non-festive Werner Herzog.
Sure to keep you awake on Christmas Eve….
With the night’s already drawing in, it’s time to turn our eyes forward to the winter holidays, and around here that means one thing: Hallowe’en.
Generally speaking we’re a bunch of pantywaists down at STS towers, but if there’s one thing guaranteed to stop us hiding behind the sofa and get us out and about on the spoooookiest night of the year, it’s the promise of some classic head-off-shoulders-catches-fire-turns-dogs-inside-out John Capenter action, so we were especially pleased when the marvelous chaps at top discount website vouchercodes.co.uk and Most Wanted got in touch to tell us about their new all hallows eve promo.
For one night only, it seems they’ll be taking over a fancy-schmancy central London location, laying on booze and popcorn and showing at least one of the above classic horror flicks – but which one?
Well, that’s up to us see – It’s one a’dem crazy ‘bloggers choice’ award things! Huzzah -finally someone respects our opinion! This despite the fact that I nominated ‘The sasquatch Gang’ for Oscar glory last year.
While freddy, Leatherface and even dear old Satan himself all have there attractive points, we have to say that nothing scares like the thought that your friend, your lover, or heck -even you, could at any point turn into a hideous multi-mandibled star-beast hell bent on wiping out mankind!!
Of course, we’ve been wrong before. What do you think? Is The Shining scarier? Does ‘Dawn Of The Dead’ put the willies up you in a way that ‘The Thing’ never will?
We’re going solidly with the alien menace on this one – but if you think we’re wrong -then hell kids – let us know!
Going solely on the trailers, the latest effort from Will Ferrell looks like a return to form, a crazed mish-mash of Lethal Weapon action and Anchorman stupidity. And it is. But for some reason, it just doesn’t gel.
Things get off to a promising start, with New York super cops Danson & Highsmith (Samuel L. Jackson and Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson) blasting their way through criminals, driving a 1960’s muscle car through the side of a bus, blowing up buildings and firing off enough hot lead to drown a Terminator, and despite the reckless endangerment and massive property damage, they’re beloved by the population of New York and the worldwide media.
Of course, it isn’t all guns and glamour in the NYPD, which is where Ferrel, a safe, quiet and relentlessly stable Police accountant comes in. Teamed up with a bizzarrely hirsute Marky Mark when Danson & Highsmith jump to their death in a ridiculous display of bravado, it’s up to the worst cops in the precinct to take down Steve Coogan’s Bernard Madoff-like businessman and save the police pension fund.
All pretty formulaic no?
And that’s half the problem (we’ll get to the other half in a bit).
The Other Guys follows a very basic plotline that works out ok, and has some very funny lines. Ferrell’s background as a naive pimp named Gator is hilarious, and Wahlberg shows some likeable comic timing, coming off as likeable and genuine while directing traffic, lusting after Ferrell’s ‘plain wife’ (actually a smoking hot Eva Mendes). The whole thing is crammed to bursting with ridiculous one liners, idiotic situations (dirty Mike’s homeless orgies are a particular standout), and a relentless driving pace.
So what went wrong?
Ass is the norm for Ferrell’s movies, things don’t quite fit together properly. You get the feeling that someone had four or five unused scripts lying around and rammed them uncomfortably together. Of course, in a bit of nonsence like this, that’s not really a major problem. Instead, The Other Guy’s problems sit squarely in the lap of director Adam McKay.
The whole thing is poorly paced and badly shot, to the extent that any life and vibrancy is sucked right out of the thing, and it’s not just a question of scale. If this had been shot in an intimate TV show style it would be balls-out hilarious. Likewise, if they’d stuck McG at the helm and soaked it in slick then we’d be on to a winner (and I promise never to associate the name McG with the concept of win again). Instead, the movie hovers in a washed out, curiously 80’s middle ground, with action not as exciting as it should be, gjokes not as funny, and the whole thing…well, just underwhelming.
This has some of the best comedy lines and concepts of the year, but much like Ferrell’s wooden gun (a long story involving Michael Keaton and a poorly executed ‘desk-pop’…), it fails to leave a lasting impression.
Definitely worth waiting for the DVD, as a small screen would be infinitely more suitable.
…we watched it again, yes. But only because it’s so bloody ridiculously good. And they gave us free beer.
But this time we saw it in the Apollo cinema in London on a Sony 4K 3D Screen.
What does this mean? You ask. These numbers, letters and brand names are all a bit Electric Spectre for Slashing The Seats, a blog more at home with yelling at crappy directors and praising lord god Robocop.
Well, let me tell you. Sony 4K projects are a new thing that makes watching 3D movies actually pretty cool. The technology behind 3D is a bit of a dick really. It’s like listening to an amazing story delivered by someone with a mildly annoying voice. You see, 3D is delivered by showing one frame designed for your left eye, and then one for your right eye. At 24 frames per second. For hours. This messes with your brain a touch and is why it gives people headaches. Your brain and eyes are designed for the real world, not trickery.
What Sony 4K does is have two projectors, one for an eye each. Meaning your brain doesn’t get confused, overheat and cause you to drool into your popcorn. And it makes the screen brighter, crisper, less flickery and generally, nice.
It’s 3D without being a dick about it.
It also has a ridiculously huge pixel count. So it makes my newly bought 1080p 42 inch TV look like a turd. Bastards.
We were given a nice talk from a man from Sony, clearly excited by his own product, explaining all of this and a dude from Apollo cinemas telling us they’ll start rolling these projectors out across their chain.
So, if you like proper 3D delivered..err.. properly, head on down to one of their cinemas…
And yes Toy Story 3 is bloody amazing. But you’ve already read the proper review, haven’t you!?
